Hello All.
First of all, I would like to say that I appreciate you taking your time to read this mini-novel/question. I have a few, and hopefully this will help with some answers.
Now to some facts:
I am 19 years old, and have been with my current…partner for quite some time. We are financially stable, although are currently in different states.
I have a severe case of PCOS, aka: Polycystic Ovary Syndrome.
I am ADHD and OCD.
I have been on the pill for over 2 years.
I have had 2 miscarriages, and I had a daughter out of incest at 15. She was 18 weeks early, and lived only 3 days. I suffered from pre-eclampsia, and it was a fairly rough pregnancy.
I tested as a carrier for the Tay Sachs gene.
I am adopted, with no previous knowledge of my biological family or past medical history.
I am around 240 lbs, with a WHR of .72 (I am very curvy, with extremely wide hips, and a larger bust)
Now, current facts:
I am pregnant….with triplets!
My doctor has offered a reduction, and says that I have a high liklihood of losing one, or even all of the babies. I conceived the week of April 6th though April 9th.
My partner has a son who has Aspbergers syndrome and ADD.
My questions and concerns are as follows:
I am planning to travel by car for a 10-13 hour car ride to be with my partner. (We just found out today!) Is it safe for me to travel during my first trimester? My doctor is at a free clinic (I just was laid off from my job 3 days ago, and lost my health insurance) and gave me the all clear to travel. What precautions should I take? Is there any way for me to travel easier? How can I stay comfortable? Any advice?
I am already showing a little bit! Am I crazy and seeing things, or is it really possible for me to be seeing this? I’m not talking a HUGE difference, but enough I can see one. Am i hallucinating?
My doctor mentioned a reduction to improve my chances of carrying to term. I am not a supporter of abortion except in certain situations. These triplets were conceived naturally at a million to one chance. Again, I have PCOS, and I was on the pill. I mean, seriously, what are the odds? Why should I have a reduction? WHy shouldn’t I? Isn’t “multifetal reduction” just another term for a partial abortion?
I have serious guilt issues regarding my daughter, and the loss of her. Could stress and guilt make things worse in my current pregnancy?
I’m exhausted all the time. I slept for 15 hours two days in a row! I am usually high energy and can go a 48 hours without sleep (due to work) Could there be anything wrong?
How can I make my pregnancy easier?
What exactly is “vanishing twin” and what are the odds of it happening to me?
Is travel out? What can I do to make the trips easier?
There is a high liklihood I could lose this pregnancy, my partner has his hopes up, but not too high just in case. Should I follow suit?
Thats all for now. Thanks for reading!
I am adopted. My first pregnancy was out of my adopted family. I consider it incest but by technical terms I guess its not.
My doctor said I was 6 weeks along. I estimated conception. Could I be wrong? I know its triplets because I had an ultra sound. There were three seperate sacks.
Sorry for jumping around a lot, my mind is just whirling!
incest….and u have no knowledge of ur real family…shit dont add up
You would be what, at most 4 weeks a long? How would they determine you were having triplets at this stage? At this stage its common for no heart beat with even a single baby. What would they do to see 3 separate babies?
I hope that there is an explanation and I am just confused but this is a very detailed story about there babies you shouldn’t even know about.
***Sorry Basilis I hit thumbs down accidently. i confess i hit the button ,
How is it possible to have an incest and have no knowlage of your biological family? Please explain?
Yes, it’s just another word for abortion. Please don’t do it. Those babies were created for a reason. I think you should give them a chance.
Your story is whack Chicky- Your crap just don’t add up, get your stuff str8 then ask again and maybe we can help ya out;)
—What precautions should I take? Is there any way for me to travel easier? How can I stay comfortable? Any advice?—
Travel by car. Stop often – every hour or so, and get out to stretch your legs. You may have to spend the night somewhere along the way. Try to get someone else to drive with you so you can share driving and so you can stretch out in the backseat. Wear comfy, loose fitting clothes.
—I am already showing a little bit! Am I crazy and seeing things, or is it really possible for me to be seeing this? I’m not talking a HUGE difference, but enough I can see one. Am i hallucinating?—
You are carrying TRIPLETS. Of course you should be showing.
–Isn’t “multi-fetal reduction” just another term for a partial abortion?– Yes. This is a personal choice between you and your partner. Personally, I could NEVER chose which one of my kids to murder.
—Could stress and guilt make things worse in my current pregnancy?– Yes, stress can hurt your pregnancy. Put aside thoughts of your other daughter and concentrate on these for now or they will end up joining their sister.
—I’m exhausted all the time. Could there be anything wrong?– You are pregnant. You are SUPPOSED to be exhausted. If you were not, then you should be worried. Maybe you can get someone else to drive for you and you can sleep the whole time. (Greyhound, anyone?)
–What exactly is “vanishing twin” and what are the odds of it happening to me?–One of the babies dies and is re-absorbed into your body. It was there, then it wasn’t. It will show up on a sonagram as an empty sac.
I would NOT take this trip. Stay where you are and have him come to you. Then you can take several days of slow leisurely travel to get to your new home.
My suggestion to you would be to stay where you are unless it is a hazardous situation. You are a high risk pregnancy from the start since you are carrying multiples and high risk pregnancies should not travel on flights or long car rides because if something were to happen you have no where to seek help.
I was showing at 8 weeks and this is my first pregnancy and it is only one so if you are carrying 3 i am pretty sure that you can notice a change in your body.
If a reduction is something you and your partner can agree on then do it. I can be hard to lose a child to save the others, but thats your decision to make. I can only tell you if I were in the same position I would not do it and if the babies do not make it then it happened for a reason. It would be pretty much pointless to kill a baby because it has a risk of dying in my opinion.
You are going to be extremely tired. One baby makes you tired to the point where you can sleep almost 2 days straight your growing three here. So you are going to have way more blood pumping in your veins, three sets of organs to grown, three sets of bones, and three bellies to nourish. Naturally you are going to be worn out. Imagine doing all that at the same time with the babies out of the womb. It is not much difference.
As far as your daughter goes. I know how you feel, but stressing out can cause harm to the children you are currently carrying. Who knows maybe she is growing inside of you and has a second chance now so do not grieve over her. Focus on nourishing the ones who need you now in your belly.
You can make your pregnancy easier by resting on your left side when you get the chance, eating a proper diet (ask a doctor for the appropriate amount of calories you should be getting) I know with one baby its an extra 500 so you may need 3 times, and try swimming for exercise this will keep pressure off your knees and it is low impact (no jumping of course). Yoga for exercise may become a hassle since you belly will be bigger than average thus making balance tough, but breathing exercises are always a plus.
Vanishing twin syndrome occurs when a twin pregnancy is confirmed then at the next ultrasound there is only one fetus. The other one has been absorbed by the mother, placenta, or other twin. It occurs in 21- 30% of the time in multiple pregnancies and even single ones. Studies show 1 in 8 people are concieved with a twin but only 1 in 70 are twins. If it happens do not dwell on it for you still have other babies to care for and love. It would be selfish for you to be upset and forget you are a mother to them as well.
As with every pregnancy you should not start shopping for baby clothes or clearing out the room for the nursery until you are past the first trimester. The same thing goes for you.
I hope I helped some and congratulations on this pregnancy. You are a 1 in a million mom!!! LOL