Hi,
My husband refused to do any shots for our baby. He is 7 month old now. I’m going to bring him to my country of Kazakhstan in 5 months to visit.
I believe that baby needs to be vaccinated no matter if he’s going to travel or not.
But my husband says that there is a chance of him being autistic after shots.
Everyone in my family, and his family got shots, and nobody was autistic. And many kids happen to be just fine. Our kid didn’t get even a flu shot. And flu is around all the time.
How would you act in this situation?
P.S.My husband is 22 years older. He is an American man. Never was married, never had kids. Very controlling about everything – even a food in our family. My fault of being too idealistic and not caring about real life stuff. But I was the one who delivered the kid, all naturally, went home 5 hours after delivery – my husband chose a center with such rules. And… he makes 6 figures a year. And we still don’t have any medical insurance for a baby… We don’t have a car, and that’s why I coudn’t go to the birth classes. He got a taxi to bring me to the maternity center and back. Left me there with no food, I was starved after the delivery – he didn’t leave any money, cell phone bills weren’t paid… I don’t want a baby be separated from the father. He loves him his own way. I never had father. But living like this – is it ok?.. P.P.S. I know I sound like a loser. I was a journalist in my country. Raised by a very controlling mother. Had AA in Music and Bachelor in English. Basically I escaped from her to US to do things my way. I was almost 24. Always wanted a full family. We live with my husband last 4 years. I’m 28, almost 29. I could have left all this time. But just lost the vision for my life. He is very educated. It kept me on leash – I love to learn. Just got my papers fixed last week. Sorry, for all of this. It’s not a typical question for Maternity section.
do it anyways. I’d rather vaccinate against a disease than to let my child get a horrible disease. There is no fact that your child can get autism from vaccines. I had all mine and I’m not autistic. My children all had theirs and they are fine. there is no proof of that at all
These are the types of things you need to talk about before marriage.
It has just been proven that the jabs do not cause autism and the man who claimed they did has been struck off.
@Lisa.
I wasn’t vaccinated and I’m complaining.
I got Mumps at the age of six and am now deaf because of it. Kindly step off your high horse.
I couldn’t be bothered reading all of that, but you’re talking about MMR right?
There was never any proof, just a suggestion and there have been about 5 studies with proof agasint that.
You’re husband is douchebag! Why would you want to be with a man like that much less breed with him and give him someone else to control.
Get out while you can.
Just get them done. He needs them. If you son is gonna go to a public school then he will need to have all his shots and if not he can not attend a public school. There is nothing wrong with getting your child vaccinated. Its healthy for their health. And it will help fight childhood illness. Like chicken pox and Polo and other sick illness that could kill them. It will not help them not get it but it will help it if he does get it it will lower it. There are no studies that have linked Autism to having shots. My cousin was born with Autism and never had shots until school aged. So don’t believe that. A child needs to be vaccinated weather or not if your gonna travel. If your son doesn’t get vaccinated and goes to another country and brings back an illness he could die. Thats why they suggest getting a baby vaccinated cause if he does get something the shots would help him lower the disease. Also it sounds like you need to get rid of your controlling husband.
Your husband does sound controlling. But there are also very nice people who are against vaccines, who have very good reasons to be. You sound like an educated person. You might find it interesting to ask your husband to provide you with his research regarding vaccines, so at least you could understand why he is against them.
Your life right now sounds difficult. But it would be a lot more difficult if your son developed health problems from vaccines.
I’ve read and heard many stories from parents who regret vaccinating their child(ren). I’ve never read of or heard of any regrets from parents who don’t vaccinate. My children have never been vaccinated, and they are the healthiest kids I know.
Here is an interesting article about a large medical office in Chicago that has a lot of unvaccinated patients. Among the thousands of unvaccinated patients, there is no autism and an extremely low rate of asthma.
In the general U.S. population, autism is 1 in 110 kids and asthma is 1 in 10 kids.
http://homefirst.com/info-1/vaccine-choice/autism-and-the-homefirst-practice.html
Your husband is quite simply wrong.
There is no evidence whatsoever that vaccines cause autism or are even associated with autism. That claim has been thoroughly investigated and no link exists.
Those opposed to vaccination are extremely dishonest. They’ve been presented this evidence and yet they keep making the same claims. Your husband has fallen for their lies.
well there are some side effects of vaccination but it will be worse on your baby if they don’t get it..you & your husband both need to gop talk to a physician about this to make you both feel more comfortable about the decision making& mabye he will realize that there are mor good thing to get a vaccination than to not..f that doesn’t work than do it anyways..your the mother..you had the child.do whats best.
As far as the vaccines go, if you feel that not being vaccinated will cause health concerns for your child, I think you have to follow your gut instinct on this one. You can try bringing your husband with you to the doctor and having the doctor explain the benefits of vaccines and the lack of data supporting the autism claims. Maybe getting the information from a source other than you will help. It seems like he’s saying no because you’re saying yes so maybe getting a neutral person involved, such as a health care professional will do the trick.
Vaccination isn’t an easy subject. The MMR debate was very complex, and the studies can never be conclusive. That is because science is always changing, and certainly for drugs, its never set in stone. Just in the news today, a blood pressure tablet, routinely given, and had no evidence it was harmful, was found to up the chances of cancer in a study. Certainly the majority of people are OK short term from vaccinations. Long term hasn’t been studied. Rare tumours, diabetes, MS , asthma and alzheimer’s are all on the increase, with no one cause. If vaccinations added with with a faulty gene, and lets say eating meat, all caused one of these diseases, we would never find out. The Autism debate is far from over, as the MMR could be just one of 5 triggers, that when added together could cause autism. That can never be tested easily.
What I look for is co-incidences. I was the victim of an ADR in 1969 and nearly died. It happened 5 mins after jab, and they still didn’t record it as an ADR. Insufficient evidence. Now common sense says statistics of ADR’s could be well inaccurate if this happens, and from what you read, it still does. Very hard to prove your child wouldnt have had a fit, regressed into their own world anyway. But I don’t like coincidenses. There were 2000 people who beleived their child was harmed by MMR. Even if only 5 of them were true, ( not enough to state MMR causes autism), its 5 more people that have been harmed by the disease in the last 20 years here in the UK. Only 3 people died of Measles over here, and all of them had immune disorders. When you work out the stats and risk of all these diseases, and you take into account that the stats for ADR’s could also be wrong, then its up to you to make a choice. Neither is wrong or right, as bad luck could be on your side. Due to my ADR, i agree with your husband.
your husband is a moron, they’ve already proven vaccinations are not linked to autism . Get your child his shots, your babies health is more important than your controlling husbands demands. He is putting his baby at risk for many life threatening illnesses. Drop this loser.
If your husband does have that kind of money, then I’d advise that you to find a lawyer and leave him. You have your papers and you can probably establish neglect, at the very least psychological control. Your son is an American citizen, and with or without papers, he needs you as a caregiver. Your husband is so much older, set in his ways — it’s not like he’ll improve. Now you have a vision for your life: your baby boy. Then you can make the choices about immunization, etc. You escaped a controlling mother into the home of a controlling man. Your life isn’t over. It’s been derailed, yes. Get back on track.
Do it anyway, It’s the American woman way.